Monday, March 29, 2010

Chinese Wedding Invitation and Ceremony

My Chinese friend Cassie is having her wedding ceremony on April 10th, and this week she hand delivered my invitation:

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Isn’t that marvelous? I love it! It’s quite stylish in my part of China for this kind of wedding invitation to be used in place of a paper invitation. Cassie is a modern and stylish girl. The invitation is engraved with their names (the top two lines), the phrase “100 Years of Harmony/Togetherness” (the larger middle line), the name of the hotel where the ceremony will be held, and on the bottom line, the date of the ceremony. It was given to me in a nice satin lined box, along with a little box of candy. Of course, this wouldn’t work for a couple who needed to list all their parents info, formalities, etc. But, I quite like this style of invitation: interesting to look at, and to the point.

I say she is having her wedding ceremony, not her wedding, because she was actually married last October in the license office. Couples who want to get married must be of age (20 for girls, 22 for boys), and take their ID cards, hometown registration papers and a few photographs to their local marriage license office. Their documents are checked, a license is issued and an oath taken. And that’s it, now you’re married. And in my city, it only costs about $1.50.

Many couples get married and then have the ceremony at a later date. This is partly because you should go to a monk, fortune teller or astrologist to choose the best date for your marriage. It’s based on your and your fiancĂ©e/fiancĂ©'s date and time of birth. Or it may be a generally lucky day, such as days with lots of 8s in it. The hotels and ballrooms fill up those days, so you might get married on that date at the office, but have your ceremony a year or two later. Cassie tells me it is not uncommon to celebrate your marriage and your child’s first birthday at the same time.

I have also found out some things I didn’t know about single moms and the status of their children, which really helped me understand some of the common decisions made regarding these women and children. I will write more about that later this week.

10 comments:

  1. That's pretty progressive that you need to be at least 20. Frankly, I think you should have to be AT LEAST 26 to get married. Maybe 30 :).

    That invitation is gorgeous!

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  2. That's pretty progressive that you need to be at least 20. Frankly, I think you should have to be AT LEAST 26 to get married. Maybe 30 :).

    That invitation is gorgeous!

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  3. Now THAT is a priceless keepsake! wow! I guess they're affordable since... it's made in China?

    (ok sorry, I just had to throw that lame joke in!) :-D

    Love your anecdotes and stories and experiences - looking forward to more!

    And hope you have a GREAT time at the celebration :)

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  4. OMG that is the most beautiful invite I think I have seen EVER!

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  5. What an amazing invite. This whole marriage/ceremony deal is very interesting to me. Thanks for sharing. So...when is the wedding?

    Single Moms? I am looking forward to your views on them in China. Here, it is no biggie anymore.

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  6. That is a very beautiful invitation. And such a special keepsake! I love the idea of getting married and then having a celebration later.

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  7. Cassie's a weird name for a Chinese. Or maybe thats her chinese name. 200 years is a bit too long. And I think they do the double marriage thing because their culture looks down on living together prior to marriage.

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  8. Wow, that's really cool! I kind of we wish we did that over here!

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  9. Errata:

    'maybe thats her AMerican name.'

    '100 years is a bit....'

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  10. >Wow, that's really cool! I kind
    >of we wish we did that over here!

    The funnest wedding I've been to was a Vietnamese co-worker getting married in a Chinese restaurant.

    They ended up with a conflict in wedding dates that split their extended family...so they *downsized* to only 200 guests at the restaurant instead of the hall for 400 they had planned.

    First, the almost the whole reception was in Vietnamese. Most of the songs played were U.S. pop but sung with Vietnamese lyrics.

    Second, the food was awesome. It was *not* "American Chinese" ... they rolled out the real stuff (right down to chicken feet).

    Didn't hurt that there was a never ending supply of Heinekens at each table.

    There was table top dancing. There were table repairs :D

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