Shanghai and New York City and Me

Well, according to your comments, of those who stated a preference, half prefer window and half prefer aisle. You window people, I admire your bladder control!

In my last post I mentioned that Shanghai is more developed than NYC. I’ve never lived in NYC, only visited two or three times a year for work or pleasure. I’ve been once to Shanghai. So, that’s my background in both cities. Here are a few reasons I think Shanghai is more developed:

1. The maglev train. As of this writing, the maglev in Shanghai is the fastest train in the world. It runs 268 - 310 miles per hour. There’s a station at the airport, and it takes seven minutes to get from the airport to the city. Now, can you imagine arriving at JFK and getting to Penn Station in seven minutes, for $6.00? How nice would that be?

2. Transport cards. In Shanghai, you can buy one refillable card and use it to pay for the subway, buses, or taxis. So convenient! I especially love that you can pay for a taxi with them, I hate carrying a lot of change. And they use hot spot scanners instead of turnstile runners, a little faster and less error prone.

3. Bus stops on the street have electronic signs telling you how many minutes until the next bus on that line will arrive. Subway trains arrive every 5-10 minutes, every time. (Hello 6 Train, can you hear this?)

4. The subway is super clean, super brightly lit, and super safe. My favorite feature is the ceiling to floor glass walls separating you from the train. It’s quiet in the stations because the glass walls muzzle the noise of the train. It’s like being in a space station in 2001: The Shanghai Odyssey. (Quiet except for the people, of course.)

5. In every taxi, there is a sign for a city hotline you can call if you are having trouble with your taxi driver. They print the sign in English, Chinese, Japanese and Korean. Maybe NYC doesn’t have this because it would be overloaded? I wanted to write down the number and call it from Chongqing, but I forgot. Next time!

(I’m sure you know people in China don’t vote, so all of this is done based on what the government, not the people, choose.)

But despite how developed Shanghai is, here are reasons I still love New York City more:

1. Diversity. Shanghai does not have the diversity of foods, population or thought that NYC has. Until you can get falafel, tacos or hot dogs on a single street corner in Shanghai, NYC will always win.

2. Beauty. In Shanghai, they tear everything old down and build new. Historical preservation can be taken to an extreme, but I love the old architecture of NYC. If you haven’t seen my youtube video of NYC firehouses on the historic register, you can see it here. It’s still one of my favorite photographic collections I’ve done. And don’t even get me started on the NYC bridges: gorgeous. If you want to see my general NYC photo collection, click here.

3. Personality. NYC has an arrogant confidence that is appealing. It’s dirty. It’s crime-ridden. But it’s where millions of people from all around the world with little to their names came to start a new life. It’s where people still go to really succeed. It has a world renowned fire department and beautiful architecture. It’s one of the greatest cities in the world, despite it’s flaws and scars. (I also think it has more eccentric, crazy people, but maybe that’s just the romantic in me.)

I leave early tomorrow morning for the dentist, wish me luck!

Anxiety, and Being Honest With Yourself

This is difficult for me to write.

(My dad, before he died, was very open to sharing with others the lessons he learned from having cancer. He wanted people to not to feel alone. He was also a very good listener, and encouraged people to share with him things they didn't feel anyone else would understand. I'm trying to follow his example.)

Anxiety is a problem for me. From stories my mom told me about my childhood, it's something I've probably always had. I've struggled with it as long as I can remember, but I thought everyone did.

Some things that cause anxiety are easily forgotten. Anxiety sometimes resulted in achievement, due to panic, so I haven't always recognized it as a problem. Some things that cause anxiety are long-term, and not easily forgotten.

In the past, I've dealt with anxiety through medicine and self-medicating, not by addressing the anxiety itself. I don't think this is uncommon.

Just prior to arriving in China, I had an experience with another person that caused me a great deal of anxiety, both at the time and afterward. I self-medicated and used a lot of denial to try to deal with it.  All of our continued contact made me anxious, both because of the past experience and the way things were between us now. The only way I knew to relieve myself of the overwhelming, at times unbearable, anxiety I felt was to stop contact. (I could not have articulated at that time, though, that I was feeling abnormal levels of anxiety. All I knew was how painful any thought or contact with him was.) I met someone here I trusted and confided in, and they recognized that the high levels of anxiety I experience are not healthy or normal and encouraged me to seek healthy ways to deal with anxiety. It has been a long and painful road, and it's not over yet, but I've been getting help with this. No more self-medication. No more denial. Instead, mental strategies and solutions, and ultimately, the confidence, to deal with it.

The most difficult thing was admitting I had anxiety I didn't know how to deal with. And have had for a very long time. I got really good at hiding it from others. I always thought of myself as very capable, so admitting it was like admitting a personal failing. But now I realize, it's an opportunity to be a stronger person. I still have moments of intense anxiety; I don't think those will ever go away. But I am learning to manage it in healthy ways, and making progress.

There is no shame in seeking help if you don't feel like you can deal with the things that happen to you. Whatever skills are missing, you can find and make a part of your life. I can't change the past, but I can have control of my future. I hope you know you can, too.

-----

Thinking and praying for the people of Haiti today. Wish there were a way for me to go help. Another tragedy, it's not fair some people suffer so much.

Flushing, Queens (Again) + The Gift Of Options

I'm getting to that point in my service where people are asking me what I'm going to do when I get home. For those that don't know, before coming into Peace Corps, I had a real life adult business job, a real life adult apartment full of real-life furniture, a car, etc. I still have the car, and the furniture (thanks mom for your storage help!), so it's time to decide about the job. (I've done my Masters but at least at this time, I'm not going to do a PhD. Maybe in a few years, we'll see.) My goal is to be an ESL teacher, either corporate or government.

I've narrowed down the cities where I'll be job-searching, and I have thrown NYC into the ring. I always thought if I moved to NYC I'd live in Washington Heights, but I really do want to live in a Chinese community. So, in the near future, I'll be making a trip back to NYC for a tour around Flushing, Queens. I've never been there, and I have no idea what it's like. I just know a lot of Chinese live there. I really have to get a feel for a place to decide if that's where I want to pursue living. Who knows, maybe I will get there and realize it's all wrong for me! Which would be helpful, I can cross it right off my list. But it might be great, too. It's not trendy or cool, but for my purposes, it would be fine. And I bet I could find a really good Mandarin school there.

In February, I'll start putting out feelers and resumes and making use of connections to get my name out there.

My service is over in mid-July. I'll be flying to Shanghai to spend some time with friends at the World Expo, then continuing on to the U.S. I'm sure I'll be staying at my mom's house while I figure out how far away I'll be shipping all of my stuff.

Scary, but exciting too! I have no money, and no idea where I'm going to end up, but I have options. I'll be okay.

Chinglish, Taxis, and Rugby: Just Another Week In China

1. Chinglish thing I said on the phone:

"I hope you feel very a lot better." The word for 'very' is frequently used in Chinese articulation. I try to break my students of adding 'very' to everything, but looks like I've caught the 'very' bug. D'oh!

2. This week I jumped into a taxi while it was making a u-turn in the middle of a busy intersection. I could see a bunch of people waiting on the other side of the street for a taxi, so I darted out in traffic and jumped in while it was pausing in the u-turn. The driver didn't even blink. I could hear people on my side of the street saying, "Look at that foreign girl!" I think I now have my PhD in Chinese Taxi Hailing. I wonder how my skills will transfer to NYC taxi hailing?

3. A couple of the Peace Corps guys here play on an expat (mostly British, Australian and American) rugby team. Our team always loses. There aren't a lot of foreigners in Chongqing compared to other large Chinese cities, so I think our team pretty much accepts anyone who wants to play. Yesterday Renee, Kristen and I went to see them play a game against a Beijing team. Spanked! But you know what? Rugby players are kinda cute. So now we are rugby fans. (Note to self: learn what the heck is going on in rugby.)

Flushing, Queens + The Neverending Parade Of Cute

I'm finally recovered from the flu; I'm not sure if the Chinese strain is the same as the U.S. or Canadian strain, but  it sure knocked me out. I'm back to my old self now, though. Hope you all have stayed healthy, and continue to be healthy.

The last few weeks I've been panicking about leaving China. I know the economy back home isn't great and I worry about finding a job. But I also panic because I don't remember anymore how to live without China. How can I go back home and have no more contact with the Chinese language and culture and people? It has been almost my whole life here, how can it vanish into a black hole of nothingness overnight?

One option is to stay here and relocate to very developed and easy-to-live-in Eastern China (Shanghai!) and find a well paying job, which with my qualifications, is probably more possible than in the U.S. right now. The other is to seek out a Chinese community in the States where I can go to Chinese school and shop in Chinese shops and have interaction with Chinese people. I watched a movie here a few months ago about Flushing, Queens, and the large Chinese expat community there. I don't know much about Queens, and I had no idea this large "Chinatown" existed outside of Manhattan. In fact, I'm still not quite sure where Flushing actually is, only that it is in the Northwest part (I think?). (Manhattan is also an option, of course, but more expensive.) I probably won't do this, but the fact I'm thinking about it? It makes me realize how much China has become a part of my life.

And if you saw cute Chinese babies all day long, wouldn't you want to continue being a part of it too?

This baby was having a nap at the grocery store. (She's a rich baby, she's wearing a diaper.) Her mom was so flattered I wanted to take her picture. Really, I wanted to take the baby! (And I say that as someone who is not baby hungry in the least. In fact, I'm pretty sure I'm missing that gene). So I settled for a picture. I'm constantly surrounded by The Cute.

Love in the Peace Corps, plus Manhattan Solstice

An interesting thing about the Peace Corps: a lot of people fall in love while serving. With each other. I didn't realize how many long-term relationships are formed between people serving in the Peace Corps, but I think it's pretty cool. After all, you're throwing a group of people together who probably have similar goals of helping others, who like adventure and traveling, and maybe even have similar life goals as far as work, schooling etc. It makes sense so many people would feel a strong connection. And you get to see them living life in action in a way you usually don't if you meet a guy in a bar, or wherever. You get a good feel for their character. I've been a poor judge of character in the past, blinded by whatever it is we get blinded by. But being here has helped me recover my discerning eye.

This picture was taken earlier this month on "Manhattan Solstice," the one day a year when the sun lines up with the Manhattan city blocks running east to west. Pretty cool! I love Manhattan, and NYC in general. Pretty much the only reason I'm considering applying to the Columbia/Peace Corps fellowship program at Columbia U. is the chance to live there for a bit. I could follow in my cousin's footsteps of living dirt poor in Washington Heights while going to Columbia, just like he wanted. Yay!

Photo Link

NYC: Shopping and Shipping

Did you know that if you buy something in NYC and have it shipped out of state by the seller, there is no sales tax?  So instead of paying the tax, you can spend that money on ground shipping and save yourself the trouble of having to haul your purchases through the city, subway, airport etc. You'll have to wait about a week to get your stuff, but then you get the excitement all over again of discovering what you bought. 

I did this on one of my trips to NYC that was mostly about shopping (back when I had a job that made money). At each store, I just had my purchases shipped back home for a small fee, and I was able to spend a week in NYC with only a carry-on sized bag. I always travel by subway in NYC when I am there for pleasure, so having a small bag is very convenient. (When I went for work I had paid car service, but most of the time I was there for pleasure.) 

Firehouses

Firehouses are beautiful to me for their unique architectural and historical place in society. Unlike office buildings, restaurants, and sometimes even churches, no two firehouses are exactly alike even though most of them provide the same services. Pretty cool!

 

Many firehouses in NYC are listed on the historic register. Using a historical register guide, I took myself on a walking tour, taking photographs along the way. (The picture at left is one of them.)  Once or twice someone working inside saw me taking pictures and talked with me about the history of the fire companies and the firehouse in that neighborhood. I loved hearing more about the neighborhoods and the people who have lived in these houses. 

If you want to see more of my pictures of NYC firehouses, click here.