Song-ing, Plus Sobbing At The Chongqing Bus Station

V.and I left Chongqing at the same time, and we left together by long distance bus so we wouldn’t have to haul all of our luggage onto/off of the train, through the train station, etc. If you go by bus, they just throw it on underneath the bus, much easier!

So we had a plan to meet at 9 AM at the very chaotic and crowded bus station. In Chinese culture, you never let someone leave alone. They even have a verb for it, ‘song’, which can mean roughly ‘seeing someone off.’ To song someone means to walk them outside (not just to the door), make sure they get into a taxi/car/bus whatever okay, and maybe even pay for it. (I have gotten into more than one good-natured fight with Chinese friends over who is paying for my taxi home!) If someone’s leaving town, you take them to the station and wait until they leave. I love this tradition, it’s very sweet, and it’s taken very seriously.

V.’s student was songing him to the bus station, and my Chinese friend Cassie was songing me. V. and his student arrived first so they got our tickets, and Cassie songed me into the bus station. But she had something she had to do and couldn’t wait until I left, so I songed her back to the parking lot. Now, I have explained before that in Chinese culture people don’t cry in public, it’s a loss of face. But Cassie started crying, and the fact she was crying made ME cry, and after we said goodbye, I started sobbing walking back into the bus station. I pushed my way through all the people until I got back to V. and his student, who kept on talking while I sat down and bawled my eyes out for about five minutes. I was sooooo losing face, everyone was staring at me, and I didn’t care in the least!

V. and his student did their best to ignore me because in that situation, that was the polite thing to do. When I was finished crying, V’s student said, “You made some good friends here.” It was simple and sweet and exactly the right thing to say. Yes, I did make good friends there. 

His student helped us load our luggage, made sure we got to our seats, and waved goodbye from the curb as the bus pulled out of the station. It was a very sweet goodbye to Chongqing.