KTV, Dentistry, Stairs and Hotel Rooms in the Countryside

First of all, thank you for your thoughtful answers to my questions on my previous post. I take them to heart.

Now, some more pictures. Karaoke in China is called KTV and it's done in private rooms, not a bar; you rent a room by the hour. (Don't rent a room without a door window!) Each room has a big screen tv and song machine, and bigger rooms also have a private wet bar and bathroom. If you ever do business in China, your hosts will most likely take you to KTV. I haven't met a Chinese person yet who doesn't love KTV. If you can sing KTV well, this gives you a lot of 'face.' There are also 'KTV girls' who entertain lonely gentleman by singing karaoke with them. This is just about as on-the-up-and-up as it sounds. (I censored the photo myself. It was full nipplage in there.)

A street dentist. Look, no wait!

An extremely common scene: adults on the street crowded around a short makeshift table, playing card games. They are usually playing for money. I love that this is the customer satisfaction center.

The area where I live has lots of mountains, so there are steps everywhere. And no elevators unless the building has more than nine stories. (I live on the 4th floor; Andrew lives on the 8th!). The city we were in also has lots of stairs, and I walked up and down staircases everyday. On the plus side, they keep your butt high and firm! 

And finally, a shot of the sink, shower and room in the 'hotel' we stayed in in the countryside. I'm cooling down my breakfast boiled egg in an ashtray of cold water.  I brought my own toilet paper, it wasn't provided.

Cry

How many times should a man's behavior cause tears before you remove yourself from the situation? 1? 2? 5? 25?

I'm curious about what you think. I think I let the number go way too high. I want to believe the best about people, so I really believed his apologies were sincere. But nothing changed.

How long do you let jerky behavior go on before you know things aren't going to change? I'm embarrassed to say how long it took me. But, it will never happen that way again.

Pink Ladies, Street Trash, Toilets and Hot Pot

Click all pics to enlarge.

Hair salons with pink lights indicate you can arrange for a prostitute inside. You can's sleep with her there, that's just where you can procure services.

The 'Organism' label on street garbage cans always makes me chuckle a bit.

When there isn't a trash can available, though, you can just dump it anywhere.

Hot Pot cuisine began in my municipality and every single Chinese person you meet here asks if you like it. It's hot spicy broth with a layer of even hotter spicy oil on top, and you pull food from the plates to cook in the pot, like fondue. But when you pull it out of the oil, you stick in a little bowl of mild oil, cilantro, garlic, salt, and MSG, THEN eat it. This place had individual hot pots, which is more expensive (and less common) than one communal pot in the center of the table. The day after you eat hotpot, you go to the bathroom every three hours or so. We call it Body Drano. It's possible to lose a few pounds after a night of spicy hot pot. Those are dumplings in my mild oil bowl.

Our table had a motorized glass lazy-susan top! Coolest thing ever. I want one for my house someday. This shot was at the end of the meal, believe it or not. It's a sign of wealth to be able to leave food on the table, so hosts will order more than anyone could possible eat to assure their status.

And finally, the squat toilet where I dropped my cell phone. Look at how high the walls are, and no door-- there was no privacy in this bathroom at all. If someone else was in there, you went into the stall right next to them so you weren't staring at each other from across the aisle. Awkward.

More pics tomorrow-

Pics, Reproduction and DDT

I'm back home for a week. I'll be leaving this Sunday for a trip to another province with friends for a week or so. A few things I want to share:

1. I went to get my new cell phone the day I returned. The sales lady was very nice and we had the usual spiel you have here: I'm American, I'm a teacher, I've been here a year, I go home next year, etc. etc. But then she asked me if I had any kids. I told her no, and she asked if I would have kids when I returned to America. It struck me I don't really know how to talk about my reproductive decisions in Chinese. I didn't expect to be asked. But then I thought about it, and it makes sense it's totally acceptable to ask a stranger when they're having kids. The fact someone might not want kids isn't part of the local culture, so there's no reason not to ask. Anyway, it was one of those moments that really illuminates the differences between Chinese and Western culture and concepts of privacy.

2. I was worried I'd come home to a giant spider nest in my apartment, but instead I found a giant dead spider on the floor next to the wall where I'd found the last one. Near as I can figure out, the leftover residue from my previous Chinese Raid attack killed the new spider. Yikes, maybe I shouldn't be breathing this stuff. I'm pretty sure it has DDT or something in it, it kills bugs in about 20 seconds. And evidently works for weeks on end. If I DO ever have kids, mine will be the ones with the tails and gills.

3. Two pics: the solar eclipse, and some playground equipment I came across. I guess this is what playground equipment looks like when there is no chance of suing someone if you get hurt. I'll post some more pictures of random things tomorrow.

Pandas and Aliens

Our students call the Foreign Teacher's Dormitory "The Panda House" because foreigners in Western China are often treated like pandas: everyone watches your every move and everything you do is interesting. People shout at you to try and get your attention. They take your picture. They watch what you eat and what you buy. And trying to speak Chinese with the locals is often a lost cause because even though you can speak Chinese, you're a panda speaking Chinese. It's like a dog speaking English; maybe you can understand the English, but you can't get past the idea a dog is speaking English. Being treated like a panda can get very tiring and, at times, grating. Some days I just have to go home and close the door. Panda time over!

But here in the countryside, we're not pandas. We're aliens. I've had to ask people to please stop taking pictures after 20 flashes in a row. Lots of shouting, helicoptering attention, intent staring for minutes on end. It's not friendly curiosity, so it's been a challenge dealing with it. I keep reminding myself we are probably the first foreigners they've ever seen in real life and keep a frozen smile on my face.

When I considered the challenges I might face being in the Peace Corps, this wasn't one that crossed my mind. I didn't understand how foreigners are perceived here. (There are reasons for this perception; the history of foreigners coming to China has not always been positive. Google 'Opium Wars' if you want to know more.) But this challenge has forced me to grow a very thick skin. I worry when I come back, I'm going to be a bit more hardened than before. On the other hand, perhaps I was too sensitive before, and a thicker skin is just what I needed to learn from this experience. So if I come home and I'm all mean and stuff, now you know why.

Total Solar Eclipse!

Chongqing lies directly in the path of the total solar eclipse, so I got to see a pretty incredible, once in a lifetime event today. I'm so glad we were in the countryside; the smog is so thick in Chongqing city, most days you can't see the sun at all. But out here (about 4 hours from the city), we had clear, sunny skies. (Thanks, weather, for cooperating.)

Around 9:00 AM this morning, we went outside with pinhole tubes to reflect the shadow of the sun onto the ground and track the movement of the moon. As the moon began to pass over the sun, the temperature dropped dramatically and the sky became dimmer and dimmer, as if someone were using a light switch to turn out the sky. And then! Total solar eclipse! The moon completely blocked the sun for 5 - 6 minutes. It was really amazing to see first-hand. I took pictures using different aperture settings, and I got some pretty good shots for a handheld digital camera. I can't wait to share them with you.

p.s. I'll be back home sooner than I thought; I was supposed to go to another city after this one, but I miss my bed. And I miss some other things I'll talk about more in another post. So, I've rescheduled that visit for a week later. I'll be back home this weekend, yay!

Hands Off The Panties!

It's tradition in China for students to exchange picture name cards with each other and give them to their teachers. (I have around 200 from students so far; yes, I'm bringing them all home with me.) There are little picture kiosks at shopping centers and near the school gates where you can choose from thousands of backdrops and have a sheet of pictures made for about $2.00. It's so much a part of the culture here, we just had to try it out. I chose this background because it cracked me up-- Hands Off The Panties!

It is also the tradition for Chinese girls to pose with their hands around their faces in dramatic gestures. I have no idea how this started, but it's everywhere. (See http://asianposes.com/category/pose/ for more examples.) I think I pulled it off pretty well. You guys, I'm integrated!

Okay, want to hear a funny story? Apparently because my hair is so dark, when I'm wearing sunglasses I look Chinese. I was wearing sunglasses and a woman came up to me at a bus stop and started speaking reaaaallly fast in the local dialect. I had no idea what she said, so I lifted my sunglasses and said, "Shenma?" ("What?") She almost fell off the curb she was so startled! I felt bad, but I also thought it was hilarious. My eyes give me away immediately, but now sunglasses are my secret weapon when I don't want to be bothered.

(p.s. I asked my friend today if the bull penis worked. He said no change, but he was already happy with what he has, so it's all good. You heard it here first: eating Chinese bull penis = an old wives' tale.)

Bull Penis and Flashdance

Still in the rural countryside, where the local specialty is bull penis. It was served to us at dinner as a delicacy, so I thought, eh, why not? Where else am I going to eat bull penis? It wasn't bad, believe it or not, just a little chewy. They told us if men eat it, it'll increase their size. I'll let you know the scientific results of that in a few days, haha. But it supposedly has no effect on women, so I was just doing it for the funny pictures. (Unfortunately I forgot to bring the cord to transfer my pictures to my laptop, so I won't be able to post any new pictures until I get back to my own apartment on the 30th or so. Drat!)

After dinner, we went to a karoake bar, where we did a rendition of Flashdance the locals won't soon forget. Did I mention there is not much to do in the rural countryside? Sunday we are going to a Daoist temple, though, and I am really looking forward to that. Hope you all have a great weekend!

Cell Phone Sacrifice To The Squat Toilet Gods

An expensive lesson I learned this week: don't stick your cell phone in your pocket when using a squat toilet. When I squatted, my cute little cell phone I love so much shot out my pocket like a watermelon seed, right down the hole in the ground.  The worst hole-in-one ever!  Picture Macauley Culkin in Home Alone, that was pretty much my face.

A janitor used a hooked stick to try fishing it out of the hole, but no luck. I was willing to let it go at this point, but because I am a foreigner they went the extra mile and found the spot where the pipe curves to exit the building. They opened the pipe, and sure enough, there was my cell phone. Sitting in sewer water. And yes, they brought it out and handed it to me. (I ignored all thoughts of germs and took it without flinching. After they went to all that trouble, what else could I do?) 

As you might have guessed, a cell phone is not meant to survive a cesspool.  It's dead, dead, dead. (The exact words of the guy in the shop where I took it to get repaired: "Your phone is hurt very bad.") But the good news is that I was able to salvage the SIM card and memory cards, so I won't have to get a new phone number. I'll be looking for a new cell phone when I get back home. (The selection out here in the countryside is about what you'd expect). I better find a GREAT deal after this sacrifice to the squat toilet gods.

(Thanks to everyone who told me my posting from email worked. If something is wonky, I apologize, I can't see it for a few weeks.)

Test Post--Can You See This?

Did this post show up? Can someone tell me if they see this?

Blogger is blocked in China, so I'm posting by email. (I'm not
traveling with my laptop, so I don't have my VPN to circumvent the
firewall.) If this works, I'll try to post some pictures and some
stories, some craaazy stuff going on!

Sex Ed and Sex Pressure

Sex Ed is basically non-existent here in China (and some parts of the U.S.!), so Peace Corps has a program for teaching basic sexual health/HIV&AIDS prevention etc. Several volunteers in my area have given this lecture and I'm going to ask to do it at my school next year. It's gender specific and culturally appropriate for this area. In addition to the health issues, we can talk about dating and social issues that aren't usually discussed here.

During the past year, I've talked with several women about sexual pressure. It's disheartening to realize how many women have felt pressured sexually to do things they're not comfortable with, and that it is often seen as something that "happens to everyone." So here are some things I'd want my students (and all people!) to know:

1. It's okay to tell their partner if something makes them feel uncomfortable.
2. It's okay to expect their partner to listen to them and not pressure them.
3. If their partner doesn't listen, they might feel embarrassed or afraid to leave, but they can leave if the pressure doesn't stop. Giving in isn't the only option.
4. It's okay to have boundaries. And it's okay to adjust them as you feel comfortable, not necessarily when society or your partner says you should. We are not machines.
5. Someone who pressures you might also blow you off, dump you, or change how they treat you. It's okay to let them go.You can find someone who won't pressure you and will listen to your comfort level.

I wish men and women who use pressure understood what effect it can have on the self-esteem and confidence of their partner, especially if their partner is not very experienced in these things. It's basically saying, "What you're comfortable with is not good enough for me. And what I want is more important than your feelings or who you are as a person."

I really hope my school lets me do this lecture. I want my students to be healthy and happy. I want them to have confidence in themselves. I want them to know what too many people learn the hard, and sad, way.

(p.s., I am leaving tomorrow for a few weeks away on one of my summer expeditions. Take care all!)

Booty Jeans

I have a Latina booty, and finding jeans that fit both my waist and butt is a constant battle. But my mom recently sent me a pair of jeans that are near perfect: Lee Comfort Fit jeans. I didn't have to wear a belt to keep my privates private!  And my booty can still run free, a lot of curve allowance. Yeah, I know, Lee is not a 'cool' brand of jeans, but if you have a booty that is on the curvy side, these might be the jeans for you. You can thank my mom.

10 Things I Didn't Know Before I Moved To China

1. Just how little the things are that can make me happy. A friend gave me Velveeta cheese last night, and I was thrilled. (And I'm still talking about it today.) This might also just mean I have very low food standards.

2. All of China uses same time zone, Beijing Time. (Imagine if the U.S. were on Eastern Time across the country, that's what it's like here.) I live in the Western part of the country, so the sun sets and rises very early. I miss evening sunshine. And morning darkness!

3. There are around 50 minority populations in China.  Before I came here, I was only aware of one: Tibetans. Often they have special laws and their own homelands. The attempt to integrate minority populations sometimes causes tension.

4. I am more patient than I gave myself credit for. But also less intelligent.

5. Chinese Muslim food exists. And, it is very good.

6. We walk like we drive. Learning to drive teaches us spatial relations and how to maneuver so that others can pass by unscathed. Lots of people here *cough* have never driven a car.

7. All television shows here are automatically close-captioned with Chinese characters so they can be broadcast to either Mandarin or Cantonese speaking audiences. (Mandarin and Cantonese use the same written language.)

8. Sometimes what appears to be a genuine friend, isn't.  (Maybe I knew this before; but here, I've faced the very harsh reality of it.)

9. South Korean popular culture is big here. This is a video for Rain, a popular S. Korean pop star. He's referred to as the Korean Justin Timberlake. (Song starts @ about minute 2. He sings in Korean and English.) Korean guys overall are popular with my female students, they are the hotties.

10. Just how deeply the freedom to make personal decisions has influenced my ability to think for and take care of myself.

BONUS: Making lists is very Western; the Chinese think in circular, overlapping patterns, not linear.

I REALLY HATE Chinese Spiders

This isn't the biggest spider I've seen in my apartment, it's just the first time I've had the composure to grab my camera before the huge can of Raid I keep nearby. UGH. I gassed it's tiny spidey heiny into oblivion! The worst was the night I got up at 2 AM to the use the bathroom and a HUGE spider was right above my headboard. AAAAHHH!

Still creeped out. Need a happy thought to distract me.

Don't you think he's saying "Come, sit on my lap."? Me too. Okay, I feel better now.

I Made A Little Boy Cry Today

Three year old boy today, running around in circles on the sidewalk the way little boys do, suddenly caught sight of me. He stopped cold, stared at me in horror, then did that kid-crumple-cry-face thing as he ran to his mom for safety. Pretty sure he thought I was going to eat him for dinner. I could hear him crying as I walked away. You didn't know I was a monster, did you?

Probably the first time he'd ever seen a foreigner close up. Sorry, kid! Next time I'll wear my monster mask and see if that helps.

Cakes, Monuments, and Brides: 4th of July Round-Up

For our 4th of July party, two of the PC volunteers had a special cake made. They wrote down the message they wanted put on the cake and asked a Chinese bakery to make it for us. I'm not going to post the picture here because some of my readers might be offended by profanity, but if you want to see it, click here. The best part is, when they went back to pick it up, the bakery had placed it in the front store window! Obviously there were no English speakers working at that bakery. (And yes, those are cherry tomatoes on the cake; tomatoes are eaten as fruit here.)

Speaking of America, I took this picture of the Washington Monument in D.C. the evening before I left for China. I felt I needed to make a connection to my hometown and home culture before I flew away for two years, so while the rest of my group went out to dinner/drinking, I went to the monuments to take pictures. The guy who spent the weekend in D.C. with me also likes photography, so I'm glad he didn't mind going with me, it's a nice memory I have of spending time together that weekend. (If you want to see more of my D.C. pics, you can click here.) I've been to the monuments countless times, and I love them every time. I had prints made for my Chinese apartment walls. They are comforting when I feel homesick.

And here's a picture I took in Vegas the year before that I just think is funny: a bride at a bus stop on Las Vegas Blvd at 2:00 AM. Ahhhh, Vegas.

I'll be back to talking about China tomorrow.

Happy 4th of July

Happy 4th of July! My grades are all turned in, I'm going this afternoon to have cute flowers painted on my toenails, tonight is a 1 year anniversary homemade pizza party, and tomorrow a 4th of July BBQ on the roof to celebrate. Hope y'all have a great weekend, too!

(This is the cake the Peace Corps Chinese staff bought us last year for the 4th of July, our 3rd day in country. It was so sweet of them to get it for us.) 

The Boy Scout of Lip Gloss

Please know, I have a Chilean mother, and in Chilean culture, appearance is extremely important. I have been conditioned to never leave the house without wearing make-up, especially lip gloss. That Peace Corps stereotype of the granola girl who doesn't wear makeup? Yeah, so not me. I looked at my make-up supply the other day, and here's what I packed for my two year stay in China:

4 eyeshadow quads
4 eyeshadow singles
2 blushes (1 cream, 1 powder)
6 liquid eyeliners (purple and brown)
14 tubes of lip gloss
5 tubes of lipstick
7 lip liners
6 pencil eyeliner/brow pencils
4 eyelash curlers
19 jars of Bare Minerals (foundation, concealer, mineral veil)

I'm NEVER going to use all this make-up while I'm here. What was I thinking? (Panic, that's what I was thinking.) Definitely overprepared.* Anyone need any lip gloss?

*Better over than under, though, because makeup here is 4x as expensive as the U.S. Not sure why.

Chinglish Shirt

I think they meant 'interpretive.' However, as it turns out, 'interpersonal' is my favorite kind of dance! So I had to get the shirt.