Youngest and Oldest Kids: Adventures of the Chongqing Nanny

I get along well with youngest children; most of my best friends and men I've been out with are youngest kids. I'm an oldest, so perhaps it's just an easy paradigm to fall into. My second year, most of the new volunteers assigned to Chongqing were guys. (New volunteers arrive every July; because we serve for two years, you serve with a different group your first and second years.) And almost all of them were youngest children.

Because I'd already been in Chongqing a year when the new volunteers arrived, I was happy to take on the role of 411 if they needed it. I told them about getting around the city and food and shopping and whatever else they needed to know. But then I started getting calls from restaurants, asking me to talk to their server to order their dinner. One of the girls sometimes called me and she was always "Hey, can you help me out? I've tried and it's not working." But the boys were like, "Hi, order my food, 'k thanks bye." I started to get annoyed by the boys. I started to feel like I wasn't their friend, I was their nanny. On the one hand, it was flattering they thought I knew so much. On the other hand, I'm not your mom. It's funny now to me how easy it was for us to fall into this pattern, because both sides were willing to take on the role of youngest/oldest. (Yes, I am stereotyping-- not all youngest or oldest kids act like this. But we did.)

I finally told them I felt like their nanny, not their friend, and I didn't like that. They started making an effort to make sure they knew I was their friend first, nanny second (haha), balance restored. Even now I sometimes still get emails asking for help with something Chongqing-related. I'm happy to help out. And they taught me more about being very laid-back, carefree and fun-loving. Youngest and oldest: it's a dynamic that works.

Happy Halloween! Hope you have a great time. Be safe! Here's a picture from last year I don't think I've shared before. He didn't know what to be for Halloween, so like a good nanny I took him in at the last minute, gave him my Chinese silk dragon robe, cut off the sleeves of this t-shirt, blew dry his just-washed gym shorts with my hair-dryer and gave him a (make-up based) black eye. I also taped up his hands but it disappeared by the time this picture was taken. I had to rush him past the guards outside my apartment because at the time they were still housing swine flu quarantinees in my building. But look at him: would YOU mess with this boxer? I still love the memory of us trying to get a taxi in our Halloween getups. Crazy Americans.

Autumn Can Change Your Life

Caution: this is kind of a girly post.

For those who don't know me personally, I am half Chilean, half American. I inherited my mom's darker Chilean coloring and my dad's American features. I'm a mutt! And all my life people (salespersons, friends, etc.) have been telling me my coloring is Winter, because I have dark hair and dark eyes. Winters have pink undertones in their skin and look great in lots of white, black, navy blue, cherry reds, purples, etc... And gray. I LOVE gray. My mom would always tell me I looked like I was constantly dressing for a funeral because I wore so much black, gray, and white. But I noticed in lots of pictures, I looked kinda terrible. I thought I just really didn't take good pictures.

So one day I'm in China innocently looking something up on the internet and I read that many Latina and Asian women are not Winter, they are Autumn: dark hair and eyes but with gold undertones to their skin, not pink, and that a quick way to check if you are Winter or Autumn is too look at the veins in your arms and legs: are they blue or greenish in hue? I checked: totally green! I've been an Autumn all along! So really, I should be wearing browns, golds, brickish reds, and warm colors, not cool. Changed my life, y'all. I started replacing all my blacks with browns, whites with creams, and cherry reds for warmer hues. It really did change the tone and reflection of my skin. I looked much healthier and less pallid. The gray is really hard to stop wearing, though. I still love it.

Two related stories:

1. I emailed my mom and said, "Guess what? I'm an Autumn, blah blah blah" and explained to her the whole theory. My mom is very fashionable from her days as a singer, so she likes this topic. I got back an email in all caps that simply said, "I TOLD YOU NOT TO WEAR SO MUCH BLACK." Touché mom, touché.

2. T. and I were sitting talking when a Chinese girl told him out of the blue, "You look like a Brazilian soccer player, but that shirt is wrong for you." He looked at me and I said, "Yeah... she's right. Let me see your arm." Blue veins! He was wearing green, an Autumn color, and he is definitely a Winter. I had a chance to color code a few of my American friends in China; I know they are all SO grateful for my help. (I'm pretty sure things like this are the things they tolerate about me.) I also share this example because I love how in Chinese culture, this was totally normal for her to say. I don't know if I'd ever tell someone I didn't know well and wasn't being paid to help that their shirt color was all wrong for them. But in China, it's totally fine to do that. Your business is my business, mi amour.

In China most people are Autumns, and I noticed that the clothing for sale reflected that: lots of yellow and green and brown and warmer colors. And I've noticed here in America, it's all white, black, blue and red. It's harder for me to find those warmer colors here. Just an observation.

Check your veins! It might change your life. (Spring is the fairer version of Autumn, Summer is the fairer version of Winter.)

Video Log: Chinese Products

A short video I made of some...interesting products I have come across here.

I made a few English mistakes, oops! I know you still love me, even though my English can be crappy these days.

Time Goes By

My birthday weekend in Vegas was awesome! Thanks for all the birthday wishes. I forgot my camera (again!) but I have been to Vegas several times. Here are some of my favorite pictures from past trips:

A view of Las Vegas Blvd:

Me and a friend I met there:

A bride waiting at a bus stop at 2:00 AM:

Kids playing a joke on David:

Vegas, there really is no place like it in the world. I had a great time at Sephora, Rebecca bought some super strong pigment silver eye shadow (Urban Decay in Vapor) and nail polish (Sephora OPI in Queen of Everything) for my birthday. I'm really into strong metals these days. My little brother got me this awesome Michael Kors costume jewelry perfume ring from Sephora. I love it!

My friend and I had a good time, and I ate many delicious foods. (That is Chinglish, btw; they aways say 'delicious foods' to describe all foods.) I'd say more, but you know the rule! Haha.

I have a few more days left here, I'm trying to get everything done. Time has flown by. It's weird, I was so freaked out by America that first week or so, but now I've gotten used to it again. And now it's time to go back. *sigh* I feel like I'm caught between two cultures.

The Best (Weirdest?) Christmas Pageant Ever

Hope you all had a nice Christmas; I ate lots of foods I am not used to anymore (read: dairy and processed meats and sugary treats sent by our various fams) and got a tummy ache, which made it seem like kid Christmas all over again, so that was kind of awesome. I got together with friends and bought myself some lavender/silvery eye shadow, so it was a great Christmas! And yes, I now get excited about eye shadow, it's a luxury purchase for me here. China: helping you find joy in the little things all over again.

Andrew and I hosted the Christmas pageant on Wednesday night. Here is my report:

-I didn't get to wear the dress! And the reason is very Chinese: they told me the shop had made a mistake and didn't reserve the dress after all, and someone else had rented it out. But I was not asked to go pick out another one instead. So I think they went over budget and no longer had the money to pay for it, but they couldn't admit that to me, it would be 'losing face', so they made it the shopkeeper's fault. I'm 100% certain if I went to the shop that day, my dress would have been hanging on the rack. I wouldn't have minded paying for it myself, but then it would have shown them up as liars and really caused 'face' problems, so I had to let it go. (This is a pretty standard Chinese way of taking care of problems.) Andrew suggested I could rent it and just wear it around the house for a day. Haha, he has no idea how close I am to doing this. But if they did run out of money, it was more important for the kids to have their nice clothes/costumes. So I didn't mind not having the dress.

-The pageant was sponsored by Pepsi and included an outdoor stage with a Pepsi background (shilled here by Chinese popstars), professional lighting etc. The opening number was a dance to a High School Musical* song. So, I'm in China, celebrating Christmas with a pageant sponsored by Pepsi, watching kids dance to High School Musical. Welcome to modern China.

-They assigned one of my male students to be my 'handler'; that is, to help me walk offstage, down the stairs, hold my coat while I was onstage then help me put it back on when I was done presenting, etc. I felt like a boxer coming out of the ring all night long. But it's a good thing he was there, those stage lights were blinding and I couldn't see anything for a few seconds after walking offstage. I'm pretty sure those stairs would have been the death of me. It also confirmed my suspicious that what I really want for Christmas is a cabana boy. (And a cabana.)

-Chinese students also think it's hilarious for men to dress in drag for skits. A few of their sketches had men in drag, and the final performance was an all male ballet, with the guys dressed in female ballerina outfits. I could have been watching any skit at an American high school assembly. It's always funny for me to find these cultural touchstones we share. Drag: popular even in China! Who'da thunk it?

*I've never seen High School Musical, they told me this is where it was from.

A few cultural notes on Chinese Christmas:

-It isn't celebrated here by the parents and grandparents, only by the current youth generation. And it's just a day to exchange small gifts with friends. The traditional gift is an apple in a cellophane bag tied with ribbon. So on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, there were tables of wrapped apples in the street markets. I compare Christmas in China to Cinco de Mayo in America: a holiday you don't really know (or care to know) the history or significance of, you just celebrate the fun parts. The dean of our department gave a speech at the pageant, in English, about how Christmas is now a worldwide holiday of peace and love. A very interesting speech.

-I tried to explain to my students that not every American celebrates Christmas, and they couldn't wrap their minds around this concept. Because Chinese is such a homogeneous culture, the idea that not everyone celebrates a major holiday is unfathomable.

-My students think Christmas is like New Year's; at midnight on Christmas Eve, I got a flurry of text messages wishing me Merry Christmas. And I found out the current mayor is trying to discourage the tradition they have here of beating people with inflatable bats in the public squares on Christmas Eve. I wrote about this phenomenn last year. He cleared out the square downtown, but on the side streets it was still going strong.

The Boy Scout of Lip Gloss

Please know, I have a Chilean mother, and in Chilean culture, appearance is extremely important. I have been conditioned to never leave the house without wearing make-up, especially lip gloss. That Peace Corps stereotype of the granola girl who doesn't wear makeup? Yeah, so not me. I looked at my make-up supply the other day, and here's what I packed for my two year stay in China:

4 eyeshadow quads
4 eyeshadow singles
2 blushes (1 cream, 1 powder)
6 liquid eyeliners (purple and brown)
14 tubes of lip gloss
5 tubes of lipstick
7 lip liners
6 pencil eyeliner/brow pencils
4 eyelash curlers
19 jars of Bare Minerals (foundation, concealer, mineral veil)

I'm NEVER going to use all this make-up while I'm here. What was I thinking? (Panic, that's what I was thinking.) Definitely overprepared.* Anyone need any lip gloss?

*Better over than under, though, because makeup here is 4x as expensive as the U.S. Not sure why.

Is The Secret Ingredient Fairy Godmother Dust?

(See English text on the packaging):

Skincare in China = weight loss in America. A national obsession. Beauty masks like this one are very popular here and cost only around $.50 each. My favorites are infused with green tea, tea tree oil or red wine. And I hate to brag, but my skin looks like a baby's butt after I wear one. Here's what they look like out of the package:

Yes, you look like a burn victim while wearing it. It's worth it. You can't find diet foods here, but you can stick all kinds of things on your face. I'm now addicted to glowing skin. Also, I'm pretty and charming. Thanks, China!

W Magazine

W is a high fashion and society magazine, with interesting photography and a cataloguing of all the beautiful jewelry, clothes, accessories and beauty treatments I'll never be able to afford. It's my little piece of cotton candy Neverland, the equivilant of playing Halo all day long. 

I've had a subscription for over a decade. W forever! But I canceled it when I came to China. Big mistake! I really miss it. I just bought the monthly issues I've missed on Amazon, to be shipped to my mom's house for me to read while I am home on vacation. And I renewed my subscription. They'll pile up at my mom's house while I am gone, but I am going to read each and every one at some point when I return. 

There are very few non-essential material things I really miss about my old life in America. W is a big one. What this says about me, I am not sure. (Another? My boots!)

5 Things That Are Not Overrated

1. My wireless mouse
2. Paid housecleaning
3. A video iPod for traveling
4. MAC 'Underage' Lipglass
5. Bananas