5 Ways To Be Awesome In China

In China, locals will tell you you're awesome in an attempt to give you "face." ("Face" is a little bit like good reputation or positive standing and it is an extremely important element in Chinese culture; causing someone to lose face is about the worst thing you can do here. Hence the government's reluctance to admit errors-- it causes them to lose face.) Here are five things I get told are awesome about me in an attempt to give me "face." Please note, these five things do not make me awesome!They are just things foreigners are often complimented on.

1. My eyes. Girls I meet here will often say, "You have really beautiful eyes." What they mean is, "You have round eyes that have an upper lid/lower lid crease fold." Eyelid tape and plastic surgery to create the Western round/double lid look is popular here. There are plastic surgery ads all over the place, but instead of advertising big boobs and lipo, they advertise eye shape and skin reconstruction. I feel bad when they compliment my eyes, because I want them to value how beautiful their own eyes are.

2. Use chopsticks. Most Chinese I've met believe foreigners can't use chopsticks. If they see you using them well, they are very impressed.  At restaurants, Chinese patrons will stare at you to see if you're going to be able to eat your dinner. At dinner with a Chinese friend and her friends, no fewer than 3 people commented on how well I use chopsticks. A student saw me at lunch with Andrew and said, "You can use chopsticks???!?"  Well, yeah; how else could I have been eating here for the past year? It's funny, because to us it's no big deal, but to them, it's a major accomplishment.

3. Speak at least one word of Chinese. Now, my Chinese is not good. It is passable, at best. But my students and people on the street will sometimes ask if I can speak Chinese, and when I say I can speak a little, they will invariable say, "Do you know how to say hello?"  Um, yeah. And then I'll say hello, and they'll say, "Oh, your Chinese is so good!" I guess it's a testament to how difficult Chinese is that the bar is set that low. They are very impressed if you can say anything at all. How nice are they?

4. Eat spicy food. This is especially true in the Sichuan area where we live, which is known for having very spicy food. But I can tolerate really spicy food, and my Chinese friends and students are always impressed that I dump on the lajiao and eat hot peppers whole. This is probably the biggest "face" skill I have. What they don't know is that I've been in training for this my whole life, thanks to my Chilean mother and her delicious, extremely spicy, food.

5. Be a foreigner in China. In reality, that's all you have to do to impress people. It's the hardest thing for me to get used to; I'm still not comfortable with our 'rock star' status here. We call ourselves pandars, because it's like we are pandas at the zoo: people watch our every move out of curiosity and admiration. ('Pandar' is a play on the local dialect, which likes to add an 'r' to everything.) I am uncomfortable with undeserved admiration and attention, so this is sometimes agonizing to me. During our training meeting in D.C., I remember saying that the hardest thing for me about living in China would be all the attention we get. I was right.

Daily Life Part II: Street Vendor Snacks

There are food vendors all over my neighborhood selling 'little eats' from early morning until late at night (or early morning again). Here are a few little eats foods that are popular in my neighborhood. (Click to enlarge.)

Mantou (steamed buns, left) and baozi (steamed buns with savory filling, right). Baozi is popular for breakfast. The pork filling reminds me of school cafeteria mystery meat, I'm not a fan. But I do like mantou.

Squid on a stick with lajiao (hot pepper) powder. Basically spicy calamari on a stick.












Little steamed dough baskets filled with pork-cooked glutinous rice. They are very salty, but very delicious! I can only eat two before I get full.

Shao kao (bbq). Veggies, meats, tofu and sometimes dumplings. You choose your foods and they grill it (what the lady is doing), then fry it in a wok with spices, peanuts, hot peppers, MSG, cilantro and chives (what her husband is doing). It's a great snack to eat when you are sitting at a beer garden at night, shooting the breeze with your friends.


Most shao kao places stay open 'til the early morning hours because drunk people like to eat shao kao.



Here's what cooked shao kao looks like. This dish could also be called 'iron stomach endurance training.'











This is a thin flour shell (like a crepe) filled with eggs, veggies and/or meat. Basically a spicy omelet wrapped in a crepe. You can also buy thicker pancake style ones that are filled pita-style with meat, eggs and/or veggies.




Well, I hope you've enjoyed this overview of the foods you can buy from street vendors. These foods are all available within a 1 block radius of my apartment. I don't eat them very often because I don't think they're healthy, but every now and then, they hit the spot. Shao kao is my favorite.

Thoughts about Washington D.C, Friendship, Fate and Coincidences

I've been thinking about fate vs. coincidences. Do you believe in fate? I don't. But I have been thinking lately about coincidences.

July 1st is my one year anniversary in China. Before arriving, I spent three days in Washington D.C. at a Peace Corps preparation meeting. Usually this meeting is held in San Francisco, but this one time, they changed it to D.C. And because it was held in D.C., a male friend came to spend time with me that weekend before I left for China. In fact, he was the last person I saw before I left for the airport. But after that weekend, things were never the same between us. It's sad to me things changed. I still miss how things were before. And so I wonder: what if the Peace Corps had not changed the meeting location? What if I had gone to San Francisco instead? Would things between us be like they used to be? Or was it inevitable this would happen, regardless of circumstances?

As a non-believer in fate, I believe this coincidence is just one of those things that happens sometimes. I still have regret for things I didn't do and say that weekend, so at least I've learned what to do differently the next time I'm in this situation. And I'm sure the regret will fade with time. But I'm curious: do you believe in fate? Why or why not?

Roller Queen

I've loved roller skating ever since my little sister Mishka brought me roller skates from heaven when she was born. (Thanks mom and dad, you're right, I don't hate the new baby now!) I lived across from Arlington National Cemetery as a kid, and I spent hours and hours skating along all those paths. I can't walk worth beans, I sorta fall over for no reason, but on skates? I am Kira in Xanadu, even without the awesome knee high boot skates.

So during the recent weekend of shenanigans, when we found out their small town had a skating rink, of course we had to try it out. It was like nothing I've experienced before. (Shocking, I know!) First of all, they give you two plastic bags to wear over your feet.  Do skating rinks in America care this much about foot hygiene? No, they don't. Here's a picture of me putting on my foot bag:

The rink itself was fully lit, which discouraged any sort of skating rink romance, so disappointing!, but this I could overlook. The problem was, it was also super tiny, so your hip got sore quickly because you were constantly turning. And the skates hadn't ever been oiled, so not only could you hear every turn of the ball bearings, but it added about 20lbs of tension. A good work out, but not so much fun. I lasted about 15 minutes and was done. But now I can say I've been roller skating in the Chinese countryside, and really, how many people can say that?  (And it was Friday night and we were the only ones skating, so I don't think even a lot of Chinese people can say that.) Here's a shot of the rink:

John, in the middle, wasn't skating, but he came out so we could do tricks with him. P.S. I haven't written a lot about the weekend of shenanigans, and it is not an oversight.  Not all things belong on public blogs. ;)

Daily Life Part I: Makin' Copies, Makin' Friends

I thought maybe a little glimpse into the daily life of China might be interesting. These posts will involve lots of pictures. The idea is to let you "see" what it is like to live in my part of China. If it isn't interesting, no worries, I won't keep it going. (Click pictures to enlarge.)

First, the local copy shop. When I need anything xeroxed or printed, this is where I go. You can make 70 copies or 35 printed pages for the equivalent of $1.00 USD. The lady who always helps me wasn't there today, and she is ALWAYS there, so now I am worried about here. I'll go back tomorrow to check on her. She doesn't speak Mandarin, she only speaks the local dialect, so I have a hard time talking with her, but she is very nice and we are friendly with each other. This is the front door of the shop.

Inside view. They might have Kinko's-style copy places in the East, but not out here. It's empty right now because most students are done with classes. During the school year it gets quite crowded in there!

This lady sells fried veggie dumplings and potatoes everyday on the sidewalk outside my gate, and is also someone I am friendly with. (She was shy about having her picture taken.) She prefers speaking the local dialect, but she understands Mandarin. We always smile and say hello when I walk by, even when I am not buying anything. One thing about being a foreigner, everyone remembers you! The carts of fruit you see next to her usually sell some seasonal fruits, so their product changes all year round. In the background is a small shop selling school supplies.

This little fruit stand is just outside the gate of my school. They also recognize me and know I always buy three bananas and three apples, which are available year round. It's good to buy from the same sellers because they get to know you and it helps their business if you shop there. (Locals want to shop where foreigners shop.) On the corner you can see a little stand selling bottled drinks and cigarettes. These little stands/stalls are located about every hundred feet. There is no excuse for going thirsty or smokeless in China!

Stories From My Students

My English major students had a one on one interview with me for their final exam. It took a long time to interview all 120 students, but I actually really enjoyed doing it. I asked them to talk about their childhoods, and they said fascinating things that gave me great insight into the culture here. A brief overview of some of the things I learned:

1. Roughly 75% of my students referenced having at least one brother or sister. One guy even knew how much the fine was his parents paid when he was born. He said it proudly, "I cost 3,000 yuan. I'm glad I'm here." I was really surprised at how many students are not only children. (Many of my students come from poorer areas and small villages and I think a higher ratio of people in these areas are exempt from the one child law.)

2. Several of them said when they were younger, they had little flower and vegetable gardens they cared for, and this is what they did for fun. They planted the flowers and veggies themselves. I asked them how they learned to be a gardener, and they couldn't tell me; they said it was just something they figured out how to do. They found the seeds themselves to plant, they didn't buy them. I was really impressed they did this.

3. Only one student mentioned having a tv while growing up, and only one mentioned playing arcade games. The rest of the students said they didn't have any toys to play with; instead, they played in the river near their village or played outside games with their friends. They stole food from peasant farmers or tended their own little gardens. One of them said, "I bet your childhood in America was not like mine." Nope.

4. Many students had parents that had to leave the village and go to a bigger city to find work. As a result, they were raised by their grandparents or other close relatives. Several mentioned they don't have a close relationship with their parents because the parents weren't around when they were growing up. But the money their parents earned is what enables them to go to college, so they are grateful for what their parents did.

5. The students said their favorite time of year was Spring Festival, aka the Chinese New Year. They said this holiday was more special when they were younger because it was the only time of year they received new clothes and could eat a lot of meat; now that China has opened up to the West and is more prosperous, they can get new clothes and meat throughout the year, and the holiday is not as meaningful in this regard. I didn't realize they only received new clothes once a year. It made me understand more why they have the tradition of wearing the same clothes for several days in a row here.

My students will move on next year and I will no longer be their teacher. I'm really going to miss them. They have taught me more about China than I think I could ever learn from a book. They have faced challenges in their journeys from small village to big city university, and I hope their tenacity leads them to great things in their futures. I am blessed to have been a small part of their journey.

The Friend Text Crux Hypothesis

I have another friendship theory: the better the friend, the more words I use in texts that are not in my phone's dictionary. I hate adding words manually, but some people seem to bring out the non-dictionary words in me and it must be done. (This is the worst part of getting a new phone, adding back in all the words I need.) The boring people, or the ones I don't like as much? All the words are there. Hmmm.

I think this is kind of an awesome theory, I wonder if I could get a linguistics grant to study it further?

All That's Missing Are The Cook's Butts

We had a long dinner to kick off our weekend of shenanigans-- over four hours long. We ate around 20 dishes of food, consumed 40 bottles of beer, 4 bottles of wine and countless shots of Chinese sangria. ("We" meaning the dinner party-- I don't drink any alcohol.) In short, a typical Chinese dinner. I passed the kitchen on the way to the bathroom and took a peek inside. Here's what a little Chinese restaurant kitchen looks like:

In the little restaurant we often go to for lunch, the cook always has a cigarette hanging out of his mouth, and there are butts all over the floor. I wonder how much ash I've eaten. Believe it or not, your body gets used to this style of cooking. We all got sick our first few weeks/months here, but now it's just minor discomfort, if we even get sick at all. Whoever said, "That which doesn't kill you makes you stronger" must have been talking about Chinese food. By the way, the food is delicious! It's worth being sick a few times for. This is my favorite dish, Pao4 Jiao1 Rou2 Si4. I'd never heard of it in the U.S., but I'm going to ask for it when I come back. It's pickled hot peppers with pork and a cool vegetable like celery, cucumber, or bamboo. (This is bamboo.)

And something else I thought might interest you: this wooden barrel is used for storing rice. A nicer restaurant will make fresh rice everyday. Others don't. (You can ask them when they cooked the rice to decide if you want to eat there, but I never ask.)

And here is a shot of our table after dinner was over. Dinner in America is going to seem so boring after two years in China.

3 Random Things

1. Further adventures in the breakdown of my mother tongue: I was with a friend tonight and pronounced the word 'oregano' as 'oreGANo,' as if I were saying the word 'Oregon' in Spanish. Then I said it a few times both ways, trying to figure out which way was right. We both thought it was quite funny; I cried, I laughed so hard when I realized what I'd done. I'm sure the Chinese around us were wondering what was so funny, but it is funny to hear yourself losing the ability to speak your native language properly.

2. I had this for the first time tonight, and it's my new favorite treat: a fresh mango smoothie. (Sha1 bing1 mang2 guo3.) Just crushed ice, fresh mango and honey, blended together in a big cup of awesome. It's $1.00 USD, which believe it or not is a little expensive for us to have very often, but ohhh... it is oh so good on these 95 F, 95% humidity days. I might have to readjust my meager Peace Corps food allowance to include a 'mango' column.

3. I was at a big bookstore tonight, too (I know, fun night, right?) and saw this book in the English books section. Barack Obama is very popular here; my students were actually assigned to read his election night speech as homework by their Chinese teachers. (His inauguration speech was cut off mid-stream by the local media as soon as he uttered the word 'communism,' however.) And now, an English study tool. Kind of amazing. (Click picture to enlarge.)




That's all from me for a bit. There's a weekend party being thrown by two volunteers in another city (one of them is this guy) so I'll be gone playing for a few days. I'm not sure what kind of shenanigans will be had, but oh yes, there will be shenanigans. Hope y'all have a great weekend!

The Appeal of Western Action Movies in China

Two movies my students are talking about right now: Star Trek and Transformers 2. I missed Star Trek, but hoping to catch Transformers 2 later this month, just to have the experience of going to the movies in China. (A theater near my house shows them in English with Chinese subtitles.) And I love how the names are translated: Star Trek becomes Star Boundary Lost Ship, and Transformers is Change Shape Metal Strong. Translating movie titles must be a fun gig.

Actions movies are definitely the most popular cultural crossovers here; North American humor just doesn't translate well at all. Irony and subtle sarcasm? No dice. (I've said ironic and/or sarcastic things to my students that are SO FUNNY, and I get stone faces in return. Oops.) The Office, Arrested Development, 30 Rock etc.? Not funny here; the Chinese prefer physical and visual humor.

Then again, Chinese action movies seem to be the most popular crossovers in the West, as well. Of course, this means they think all Americans are whipping out guns at every moment to deal with all problems, and we think all Chinese know martial arts, but that is another story.

The Gifts Of Time, Peace and Confidence

The short story is, I joined the Peace Corps because my dad died. I needed something to do. I thought helping others was a good way to find myself again. And, quite honestly, because I had no idea what else to do. I applied two months after my dad died, and later found out the Peace Corps will officially not consider you if you've experienced a close death within the past year. I guess they really needed to fill this position, though, because here I am.

Because of grief, my self-esteem was very low. In some cases, I turned to the wrong things for comfort. I've had to deal with some tough dependencies. I made mistakes. Not legal or moral mistakes, but mistakes toward myself. One thing I did was offend my own self-worth by letting someone treat me badly. I realize now that whatever made it okay in his mind for him to treat me this way has nothing to do with me. If my self-esteem had been normal, things would have been different, but I was doing the best I could at the time. And in a way, I have him to thank for the wake-up call for how poorly I was treating myself. I might not have worked to recover my self-esteem if it weren't for him. I think time is also healing these grief wounds. I'm grateful for time.

Was it a mistake to join the Peace Corps when I did? Time will answer that question. But caring for these kids has helped me see I still have a lot to give. I love being a teacher. I have a renewed sense of confidence in myself because I've survived these difficult circumstances. Yes, my dad died. It still hurts terribly at times. I still cry sometimes. I'll miss him all my life. But life is not over. This Peace Corps experience has given me some peace and confidence back. I thank China.

When I Said I Love Men in Ties, This Is Not What I Had In Mind

Men look hot in ties. I know they're uncomfortable, but they look so good!  And don't even get me started on the one-button-undo,knot-loosening gesture. As a guy I know from Queens says, forget it. I'm on the floor, drooling.

But...I saw this in my local shopping center, the one I can't afford to shop in. (I was walking through to avoid walking around the block.) Is this really what men are wearing Stateside these days? Nooooo...not a good look. I say this with love: this is ridiculous. No men, NO.

Links

Several of you asked for more about hot and cold foods. Here are some links I found that echo what I have heard here from locals. Please note, I'm not saying these are true, just that they are the same things I have heard while here. Obviously everyone should decide for themselves whether they believe in the theory of hot and cold foods.

As an overview, here is what I've heard:

Cold food: fruits and veggies that ripen in the spring/summer, plus duck.
Hot food: most meats, cabbage, ginger, and hot spices such as curry and hot peppers (lajiao)
Neutral foods: rice and baked/steamed white fish, breads

Here are some links:
http://www.kas.ku.edu/archived-site/chinese_food/food_intro.html
http://www.dhyansanjivani.org/chinese_food.asp
http://chinesefood.about.com/library/weekly/aa101899.htm
http://www.hypnopuncture.co.uk/cold_food_blog.htm
http://crazyowlsperch.com/hotcoldfoods.shtml
http://rgheft.wordpress.com/2009/02/22/energetics-of-food/

And here is a book available through Google reader that has information:
Manual of Dietetic Practice

And a BBC story about obesity in China. It is becoming more common in large cities with people who have the money to eat "western" style.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/3737162.stm

Hot and Cold Foods

I've enjoyed learning how the Chinese believe food affects your health. Every food is categorized as hot or cold, and they believe you need to eat a balance of these foods in order to be healthy. (Not hot or cold by temperature, but by the effect the food has on your body.) When the seasons change, you should adjust what you eat so your body stays in balance. Hot and cold foods should be eaten in a certain order to take advantage of the the temperature effect on your body. For example, at Chinese banquets, someone knowledgeable about hot and cold dishes orders for everyone, and the dishes are served in a precise order. There is an art to how food is eaten here. I think it's pretty neat, so different from our "make it cheap and filling" food mentality in the West. (I also wonder if this is one reason people here are so thin? Perhaps they eat in a way that makes maximum use of their metabolism by keeping everything in balance. I have no idea, just a thought.)

They also believe humidity in the air can build up in your body and can cause poor health, so there are certain fruits you should eat to get rid of excess humidity. If you have skin rashes, it means you have too much heat and need cooling foods. Most meats are considered hot foods, which I think is very interesting because I always thought meat made my eczema worse. If this Chinese way of eating can be believed, I wasn't making it up when I thought being a vegetarian was more healthy for me personally, due to my propensity for eczema and skin rashes. Who knows? But it is interesting to learn about this part of the culture.

And for those that have never attended a Chinese banquet, here is a camera phone pic of our table after a banquet. Dishes get stacked on top of dishes.

Well, James Bond *Does* Have A Big Head

The most popular brand of condoms in China are called Jissbon. (Yes, it means "good jizz.") The Chinese name is similar to the Chinese translation of James Bond. Use these condoms, you'll be just like James Bond! (This style is called 'super space' in English, but the Chinese characters say 'big head.') At grocery stores, there's a shelf of condoms at check out, right above the shelf of gum and candy. They are very openly sold, but I have no idea how often they are purchased.

In every neighborhood in the city there are little shops selling condoms, blow up dolls, Viagra over the counter, etc. (Stores here don't have doors, so it's very easy to see what is being sold inside.) I went inside one downtown with a PC friend (we were eating next door) and we cracked up: most of the products were Russian, and looked like bad props from an 80's era James Bond film. I find it quite ironic that China imports sex paraphernalia from Russia; aren't most plastic products sold in the West made in China? Also, all the dolls had blonde hair and blue eyes. What's up with that??

Life On The Banks of the Yangtse River

I live on the banks of the Yangtse River (known locally as the ChangJiang). This is not as romantic as it sounds. It's very humid here due to the rivers, and it often rains for days on end. I can't see the river from my apartment, but it is within walking distance. Here's a picture of the peninsula on which I live (on an exceptionally rare clear sky day):

Chongqing City is divided up into districts, similar to the boroughs of Manhattan. The population in the city is estimated to be around 13 million people, but Chongqing is mainly known as a factory city, not a city of business or finance or entertainment. I read in the local paper that an estimated 2,000 people a day come from the countryside into Chongqing looking for unskilled labor work. Based on what I have read about NYC history, Chongqing must be a bit what it was like living in NYC around the time of the Industrial Revolution; the lack of services, sanitation issues, factory pollution, construction and fire safety issues, Tammany Hall style politics, run down apartments and constant construction do not make this an easy place to live. But there is an energy to the city, as if it knows it is a city on the cusp of becoming something wonderful in China. I can only imagine what it might be like to come back and visit in 20 years or so, to see what has become of the the possibilities here. I look forward to that.

Sometimes I am still shocked that I live here, that living on the banks of the Yangtse is my everyday life. I wonder how anything else is going to compete with this experience. It's stressful and chaotic, but it's also vibrant and energizing. I'll never be the same person again for living here.

"Your Son Is In Good Hands"

I've decided to start a funny t-shirt collection. This one isn't Chinglish, but I still thought it was funny. And I do have good hands! (This shirt is xtra large, a medium in western sizing. If you buy a Chinese shirt, be aware of the sizing difference.)

I learned today that saying 'chop chop' meaning 'hurry' or 'fast' is Chinese in origin. Maybe I am the last one to realize this? It comes from the same translation as 'chopsticks.' In Mandarin chopsticks are called 'kuaizi', which translates literally as 'fast ones.' When I want someone to hurry, I am going to start saying, "kuaizi kuaizi!" as a little Chinglish joke. No one will get it, but I will laugh inside. In other news, I am a dork.

I Hate Surprises, But I Love John Krasinski

I hate surprises. No, really, I do. I would rather watch a movie I've already seen or read a book I've already read. I like knowing what's going to happen. Even when the surprises are supposed to be romantic, or fun, I don't really enjoy them. I don't like not knowing what to expect. (China hasn't beaten this out of me yet.) I want to know upfront what you want. The men who get anywhere with me are direct, and don't spring anything on me. (Sorry, but this is one chica who does not like the swoop-and-surprise-Predator-drone kiss. I actually have a funny story about one such kiss. Another time I'll have to share it.) So, when I read this quotation from John Krasinski, I swooned:

"I'm a huge classics fan. I love Ernest Hemingway and J.D. Salinger. I'm that guy who rereads a book before I read newer stuff, which is probably not all that progressive, and it's not really going to make me a better reader. I'm like, "Oh, my God, you should read To Kill a Mockingbird." And people are like, "I'm not 15." Still good, though."


Yes! John can't be the only guy out there like this, can he? Oh, and John? I love To Kill A Mockingbird. Call me!!

Love in the Peace Corps, plus Manhattan Solstice

An interesting thing about the Peace Corps: a lot of people fall in love while serving. With each other. I didn't realize how many long-term relationships are formed between people serving in the Peace Corps, but I think it's pretty cool. After all, you're throwing a group of people together who probably have similar goals of helping others, who like adventure and traveling, and maybe even have similar life goals as far as work, schooling etc. It makes sense so many people would feel a strong connection. And you get to see them living life in action in a way you usually don't if you meet a guy in a bar, or wherever. You get a good feel for their character. I've been a poor judge of character in the past, blinded by whatever it is we get blinded by. But being here has helped me recover my discerning eye.

This picture was taken earlier this month on "Manhattan Solstice," the one day a year when the sun lines up with the Manhattan city blocks running east to west. Pretty cool! I love Manhattan, and NYC in general. Pretty much the only reason I'm considering applying to the Columbia/Peace Corps fellowship program at Columbia U. is the chance to live there for a bit. I could follow in my cousin's footsteps of living dirt poor in Washington Heights while going to Columbia, just like he wanted. Yay!

Photo Link

Sleepy Girls On The Subway

I love how the mom is holding her daughter's head up. I wonder if that was comfortable?  Before I took this picture, her brother (on the left) kept trying to pat her face. She pitched a fit and his mom yelled at him to leave her alone. It's funny how kids are the same all over the world.

I also love this pic because it reminds of me when I'd fall asleep next to my dad on the D.C. Metro and he'd carry me home. Sometimes I was just pretending to be asleep so I didn't have to walk. I think he knew.

The One Child Policy

The one child policy is more complex than I realized. A brief summary: when couples get married, they are issued a marriage license and a birth license. (There are people exempt from this law who can have multiple children, such as farmers and minorities.) If you have a second (or subsequent) child, you have to pay a fine. Back in 1979 when the policy went into effect, no one had extra money to pay this fine. But now with the wealth coming into China, it's not a big deal for many urban families to pay the fine. And a few years ago, forced abortions ended by law; whether or not this is enforced, I don't know. In any case, it seems it is quite possible to get around the one child policy. For example:

1. One of our training language teachers has three children in her family; she's the oldest, and has a younger brother and sister. Her mother had an exception to the policy because she was from a farming family, and they paid the fine for the youngest child and gave her a different last name. The two oldest kids have the father's last name, and the youngest has the mother's.

2. The boyfriend of one of our volunteer's has an older sister. When his mother was pregnant with him, she was eating dinner in a restaurant when the family planning enforcers tracked her down and came to the restaurant to force her to have an abortion. She literally escaped out the back door of the restaurant and went into hiding. After he was born, they paid the fine.

3. A few of my students casually reference having a brother or sister. I haven't asked them about it, but I'd like to. There are a lot of questions I have. For instance, can these children be born in the hospital, or do they have to be born at home? It does seem that once you have the second (or third) child, you pay the fine and it's over. No need to hide the child or pretend you didn't have it. And in some cities, it's even become a status symbol to have multiple children, because it means you can not only afford to pay the fines, but pay the school fees for multiple children.

I didn't know about the exemptions or fines before living here. Everything about China seems to be more complex than I realized.

I'm Wearing This Outfit On The Plane Home

When I first got here, one of the girls who had already been here a year told me I would know I had assimilated when I started thinking the local fashion was cute, not crazy. Yup. I was walking behind this girl on campus. She pulls this outfit off quite well, don't you think?

Also, notice her boyfriend is carrying her purse and umbrella? It's a sign of love here for a guy to carry all your crap. My students asked me if in America, the boys carry their girlfriend's purses. I tried to say, 'Hells to the no!" as tactfully possible. The dating culture is firmly stuck in the 1950's here. A student recently turned in an essay that said guys here will ask a girl out by sending her a note that says, "I would be the water that grows the flower. Will you be the flower?" I am not making this up.

Upcoming Events

So, here's how my life is going lately, and in the near future:

I start finals next week. I'll be doing 8 hours of oral interviews, 6 hours of administering written exams, and who knows how many hours grading 60 research papers. I've spent the last week or so writing all the exams, now I just have to wait for the school to schedule them and tell me when to show up. Taking exams sucks, but writing them is not much better. Especially when I am encouraged not to fail anyone. But that is another story.

Exams go for two weeks, I turn in grades, and I won't have to be back at school until the second week of September. A lot of time off!  But I spend the last two weeks of July in a city about 5 hours away doing teacher training, so it won't be a continuous break.

I won't be going home this summer due to the cost of the ticket. So, I'll be kicking it in China (perhaps Cambodia), studying Chinese, working out, exploring China, etc. And getting ready for next semester. I might not have a lot to say here, so there might be some blog blackouts. But, I hope my summer isn't too boring.

International Mailing Tip

Did you know Amazon will mail books, CDs and DVDs to many countries around the world? They do, for pretty reasonable rates. (Shipping a book to China costs about $10.) But it appears thieves have figured out Amazon boxes contain items that can be easily resold on the black market. If you send someone a package in a less-reliable country, DON'T use an Amazon box. It's very easy to slit open the bottom, steal the resellable items, and retape. I know this from personal experience. At least they left the candy inside!

If I buy something online, I have it sent to my mom's house and she sends it to me in a Priority International box. She puts it on the customs declaration, but I guess those aren't read in-country because nothing has been taken from these boxes. The Post Office International Priority boxes are very reliable; they arrive in about 10 days. First class mail is currently taking about 6 weeks to get here. Things I send to the U.S. and Canada are taking 2-3 months.

My New Friend

I was grading papers today in the school's courtyard and this very cute little girl wandered over to stare at me. I was eating these little cracker thingies so I gave her one, and then we were BFF.  How cute is she? I see about a hundred cute little girls every day. They are just adorable here.

(And can you see what's in the background? SUNSHINE. It was a Chonx miracle!)








She's trying to peer into my cell phone camera lens. After I took her picture, she wanted to see it on my phone. She was a very self-aware pre-schooler. And btw, whatever I could smear on my face to make my skin look like hers, I'd do it. No questions asked.

Sweet Touches, Plus Why The D.C. Metro Is My Favorite Subway

Chinese friends are very affectionate with each other. It's common for two female friends to hold hands while they walk together, or to put their arm around a friend's shoulder while they sit together. (I snapped this picture today with my camera phone when they didn't know I was looking.) And it's common for guys to put their arm around a friend's shoulder while walking, or while sitting together. The concept of personal space is very different here,  it's superclose. I've literally felt people breathing on my neck in line at the grocery store.

I haven't sat so affectionately with someone since I rode the D.C. Metro with a guy I really liked, just prior to coming to China. (I'm usually not one for Subway Snuggling, but with him, I was.) Although I always kiss hello and goodbye with one of the male volunteers here (he started it, because I am half Spanish, I think), I mostly just do the Western hug with friends. But some of my students have started using these little Chinese friendship gestures with me, and I think it's very sweet. I take it as a compliment.